Tweets

71 deaths, @theresa_may. "Never again", you said. Never again. https://twitter.com/PeteApps/status/967025076456579072 …

Ben Bradley tweeted this at 10.30pm on a Saturday night and I know he’d be gutted if anyone missed it so please do RT https://twitter.com/bbradleymp/status/967526680188375040 …

We would hate to see the sub-optimal timing of @bbradleymp's tweet apologising to @jeremycorbyn for slander, impact the visibility of said tweet. So we've sponsored it for £100 targeting conservatives over 35 years old for the next few days. Have a great Sunday! pic.twitter.com/TLk06Vyn7C

On the 19th of February I made a defamatory statement about @jeremycorbyn. I have apologised to Mr Corbyn and here is the complete text of my apology. Please retweet. pic.twitter.com/6JZc8O9E82

Tough competition at the first quarter final of this year's @MusicalComedyUK Awards, headlined by @MitchBenn (at @ThePhoenix_w1 in Oxford Circus, London) https://www.swarmapp.com/c/3thesAP6U1U  pic.twitter.com/1AAF1Gf1wR

#awkward

Teched another fun one of @JodyKamali's @BeckenhamComedy Cabarets, headlined by @DanAntopolski (@ St. George's Church Hall) https://www.swarmapp.com/c/4bQgsmA8oyN  pic.twitter.com/YWV2ue69LJ

I am going to offer these 2ft x2ft canvases to the Tate gallery to hang .If not I will make another 10 limited editions and offer them for sale at £1000 each and donate to GOSH. If I can get @piersmorgan to sign them its £2000. pic.twitter.com/WcW2wjHbrV

If teachers have to carry guns, Presidents should have to read books.

. @michaelgove One step ahead of you. EU legislation on single-use plastics coming before the summer. Maybe you can align with us? #EUDoesntSuck #StrongerTogether #PlasticsStrategy https://twitter.com/BBCPolitics/status/966993609680736257 …

so THIS is why eggplants are called eggplants. the world makes so much more sense now. (these are unripe baby ones) pic.twitter.com/GN190wYC8s

I know a lot of these... https://twitter.com/urbandictionary/status/966706702006530048 …

“in order to stop hackers from gaining root access, we will give all users root access.” - the nra, writing software.

*Confirmed* Congratulations to @NDAtweeter, who have dropped the Daily Mail from their online advertising programme https://twitter.com/NDAtweeter/status/966611370472099841 …

@beziergames

I just liked “Dan's LA Success Story” on #Vimeo: https://vimeo.com/124351503 

I just liked “Dan March Showreel 2017” on #Vimeo: https://vimeo.com/119145028 

New game #Werebeasts going down very well (like a can of chow) at our weekly big games Meetup (at @PepperSaint Ontiod in Crossharbour, Greater London) https://www.swarmapp.com/c/aEKbio5GdLL  pic.twitter.com/vQSNtCbcub

pic.twitter.com/HM8EuncAx1 – At The Miller

lads, it's time. it's time to nationalise the Daily Mail.